Terrible Thames

Troubadour Wembley Park

Available to 1 September 2024
What else is on at Troubadour Wembley Park?

Book Terrible Thames tickets and watch the Horrible Histories live in London!

All aboard the wicked river tour of the London's landmark River Thames!

After two terrific years in London, the Horrible Histories gang are proudly setting sail for another year on the Terrible Thames!

Hear the Horrible History of the River Thames ON the River Thames!

Grab your family and friends and climb aboard the creepiest cruise in London:

  • Tremble in terror at the Tower of London!
  • Sizzle at the Savoy!
  • Be washed away at Westminster!
  • Lose yourself in Lambeth!
  • Get gobsmacked by the Globe!
  • Hold onto your head at London Bridge!
  • Escape from the Execution Dock!

One of the best things to do for families in London

As well as seeing the shocking sights and repulsive residences, you'll grab your little ones by the hands and take a dive into:

  • The horrendous history of King Henry
  • The abhorrent attitude of Anne Boleyn
  • The coarse character of Captain Kidd
  • The quintessential quirks of Queen Boudicca 
  • The revolting reasons behind Jack the Ripper

With characters in costume, nauseating narrators and conniving conspiracies live on London's river boat, you'll learn the ins-and-outs of London's most awful anecdotes and sickening stories - with all of the nasty bits left in!

Book tickets now to secure your spot on the most vicious voyage in the capital city! Guaranteed to be a great day out for families! 

Star Place,
London E1W
Show on Google Maps

How to find us

Address: Tower Bridge Quay, 10 Saint Katharine's Way, Whitechapel, E1W 1LE

What3Words: myself.object.called

By Tube:

  • Tower Hill Station
  • London Bridge Station

Tower Bridge Quay is situated on the north bank of the Thames, on the east side of Tower Bridge, and immediately in front of the Tower Hotel.

The pier is approx. 10 minutes walk from Tower Hill Underground station.

Please note: Do not go to Tower Bridge Pier. 

  • Toilets
  • Storage space for prams/wheelchairs
  • Bring your own snacks and drinks

The Terrible Thames Tour in London sets sail from the Tower Bridge Quay on the north bank of the Thames, east of Tower Bridge. 

Postcode: E1W 1LD.

If it rains on the day of your visit, have no fear!

The top deck will remain open for those brave enough to see the soggy sights of London.

However, the performers will move to the lower interior deck and resume their performance. The lower deck is fully enclosed with windows so you'll still be able to enjoy the sights, sounds and warmth of your cruise in London.

All ages are welcome to join the tour, but children under the age of 15 must be accompanied by an adult (18+)

Children aged 0-3 may come aboard for free, but must be seated on the lap of a parent of guardian for safety. 

Please note: The tour is best suited for children aged five and above. 

Unfortunately, at this current time, the Terrible Thames boat is not a new build so is unable to offer step-free access aboard the vessel. 

However, there are plans to improve the boat by adding a wheelchair lift and accessible bathroom facilities - watch this space!

Unfortunately, your pampered pooches will have to stay at home for this one!

However, if your furry friend is an Assistance Dog and is required, then they may be allowed aboard at the Captain's discretion.

Please respect other guests and the vessel!

The Terrible Thames river cruise in London runs for 45 minutes. 

Due to daily schedules, the tour is unable to seat late arrivals.

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